


Christmas Don't Be Late !

by PatPrecieux



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Christmas Fluff, Humor, Inspired by A Christmas Carol, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-14
Updated: 2016-12-14
Packaged: 2018-09-08 14:22:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8848432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PatPrecieux/pseuds/PatPrecieux
Summary: Lestrade assembles a most unlikely musical trio.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ChrisCalledMeSweetie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChrisCalledMeSweetie/gifts).



> Musical Director : Greg Lestrade
> 
> Trio : Philip Anderson, Sally Donovan, Mycroft Holmes.
> 
> * Melody : "The Chipmunk Song."

Dialogue:

Lestrade: "Alright you tossers, get ready to sing the song."

"Ok Anderson ?"

Anderson: "I suppose."

Lestrade: "Ok Donovan ?"

Donovan: "Is that an order Sir ?"

Lestrade: "Ok Mycroft ? Mycroft, Mycroft, MYCROFT !"

Mycroft: (sigh) "Very well."

 

Song:

 

Christmas, Christmas time is here,  
Time for sex and Johnlock cheer,  
They've been good but they can't last,  
Hurry Christmas, hurry fast.

Sherlock wants a nipple ring,  
John just wants that dildo thing,  
So he'll hit Sherlock's prostate,  
Please Christmas don't be late.

 

Dialogue:

Lestrade: "Settle down. Get ready. Once again please. Well done Anderson."

Anderson: "Of course."

Lestrade: "Very good Donovan."

Donovan: "Naturally."

Lestrade: "Ah, Mycroft, you were a little fat and flat. Watch it. Mycroft, Mycroft, MYCROFT !"

Mycroft: (with distain) "If needs must."

 

Song:

 

John wants a fur lined fleshlight,  
Sherlock wants to be tied tight,  
Then they'll say on that fine day,  
"This Christmas YES we're GAY !"

Then they'll say on that fine day,  
"This Christmas YES we're GAY !"

 

Dialogue:

Lestrade: "Very good. Very good. Once more then ?"

Anderson: "Yeah ! Let's ! Yeah !"

Donovan: "Again, again, again !"

Mycroft: "Absolutely not! Excess is unseemly."

Anderson: "Who are you calling unseemly you stuffed sausage ?"

Donovan: (stamping her feet) "I want to, I want to, I WANT TO !"

Mycroft: "Don't force me to call Mrs. Hudson !"

Lestrade: "Calm down everyone, just calm.. 

Oh shit Anderson, there goes your deodorant."

 

Lestrade: "Donovan, get off your knees !"

 

Lestrade: "Mycroft, WHAT are you DOING with that umbrella ? 

Mycroft, Mycroft, MYCROFT !!!"

**Author's Note:**

> The idea of these three singing like The Chipmunks does things to me. Hope it did something for you.
> 
> Dave, Theodore, Simon, and Alvin were NOT injured in the performance, but were most probably traumatized.
> 
> For ChrisCalledMeSweetie who is the Song Parody Queen!


End file.
